It was the worst episode of American Bandstand.

    Thank God it never aired.

    Dick Clark himself was absent for the taping; he never even saw the finished product, never even met the five dancers creating havoc on the set that day.  

    But it had been necessary—this mayhem from the Jivesome Fivesome.  Mayhem motivated by love.  Love for each other.  Maybe even for Dick Clark? He’ll never know.  He’d been sent away, tricked away.  No small miracle, given his penchant for running things.

    But had he been there, leaning over his podium, observing the dancing kids, he would have noticed them immediately. They were new to the show, new to the kind of love they felt for each other too.

    And here they came, into the camera’s view, in no particular order (seriously):

1. Windra Metamucil Thrope
2. Chipper Fleeshay
3. Soyla Mopez  
4. Les Grid
5. Brant Weaver

    On that Saturday morning of September 1, 1975, they converged on Studio 56 at 4151 Prospect Avenue in Los Angeles, California for the sole purpose of saving lives.  Collaterally, however, they flaunted the latest fashions and jolted forth moves elicited by Les Grid’s hit single “Down by The East Side,” a dance ditty which had just that very week catapulted to #1 on the Billboard Magazine music chart.  It was a song that spoke of the potency of love, the poison of it, in a rhythm that proved popular.  (In other words: Had a good beat, was easy to dance to).  The kids tried, as best they could, to enjoy themselves–under the gun, so to speak—with their various clogs and heels and sneakers skidding and scuffling over ABC’s shiny pale linoleum.  Surrounding them more than the music was a deeper thumping that something bad was going to happen.

   Hell had come to these Five even before American Bandstand, in the forms of alcoholism, unwanted pregnancy (but eventually very much wanted), threats of oral sex, threats of anal sex—the latter two instances coming from a very rich woman heavily into S&M.

    However, the nastiest part of their situation had to do with a nasty drug lord and the nasty drug he’d created.     Both of them highly addictive, depending on who one asked.  And they were about to deal with the answers.  Despite what was going to happen next, they were somehow grateful they’d made it this far, to this moment, with pluck and determination, and with the help of adults who attempted to protect and love them. There were adults there too, in the studio. There had to be. No other way.

    Despite the tone of the previous paragraphs it was, believe it or not, a great time to be them. Adults included.

    The mayhem, the murders, that fucking drug—all of it culminating as Les’ song launched into the extended version, the one with the beginning thirty or so seconds of symphonic guitar flutters.  The music ushered the Fivesome into the camera’s master shot. First appearing was Soyla Mopez, whose ample figure arrested the Halston dress before Halston was Halston.  Bigger than that was her determination, which seemed boundless when it came to guiding her best friend Windra Metamucil Thrope forward through the boogieing crowd.  Windra was the angelic, willowy, white girl that, naturally, the camera loved.  And with the special lighting afforded by the production of this episode, the sweat that appeared on her expansive forward glittered like diamonds.  She too was dressed in Halston before Halston was Halston.  She looked like a million bucks, but she felt like shit. Such was the power of the illicit drug now coursing through her velvety veins.  Quickly lets add that they both looked like a millions buck, both of them dressed in Halston before Halston was Halston.

    Swaying behind them in no-name but fabulous polyester were Chipper Fleeshay and Brant Weaver, two boys dealing with the effects of the drug, but not in a way you might expect. Both lucid and free of confusion, they reflected on how they’d gotten here, to this very spot.  Especially Brant Weaver, a farm boy from God’s Country who’d been summarily beaten black and blue by an abusive father.  And guess what? Chipper had been beaten black and blue by his father too!  They were glad to be together,  having more in common than they realized, especially when it came to the kind of love they felt for each other.  They needed each other more than ever, knowing that things were going to get very bad in a few minutes.

    In seconds, actually.  

    With the time remaining, let us not forget Les Grid, the budding rock star, the singer-songwriter of “Down By the East Side” who felt anything but those things that morning.  Had he ever? Performing since he was in diapers, he hadn’t even the heart to pantomime the song, as instructed.  He stood farther from the crowd, at the edge of the dance floor, on the lookout for danger.

    He was now about to find it.  They all would.   

    Right about….

    Now!

    They never saw it coming.